Is Perfectionism Killing Your Brand [Video]

[00:00:00.00] Hello, hello, hello, hello, hello from my den [00:00:03.03] and my slippery pillows. [00:00:05.06] I wanted to come in today [00:00:07.04] and talk to you about perfectionism. [00:00:10.09] And before I do that, I’m just letting you know [00:00:13.09] that this video, it’s just all about [00:00:16.06] not being a perfectionist. [00:00:18.05] I actually, I very rarely shoot from my den. [00:00:22.07] And the light was beautiful before, [00:00:24.07] but by the time I got myself together, I lost it. [00:00:28.05] So I was going to just do a light check right now, [00:00:31.05] and then I said, “Why not, let’s go live.” [00:00:35.01] So you can see the light’s a little off [00:00:36.06] but, you know, it’s cool, right? [00:00:38.07] Because that’s the topic about what we’re talking about [00:00:41.06] and it is perfectionism. [00:00:43.06] It is to think, we’re going to just angle that [00:00:46.03] just a little bit. [00:00:47.04] We’re going to go out there [00:00:48.08] and we’re going to think that sometimes, [00:00:51.00] sometimes, sometimes, [00:00:52.07] that we need to do our hair, [00:00:55.01] that we need to style our outfits, [00:00:58.00] that we need to have the right light, [00:01:00.04] the right setup, the right everything. [00:01:05.03] And we can’t go live, and I’ve told, [00:01:07.05] I warned you about my slippery pillows. [00:01:09.01] That we can’t go live, we can’t take photos, [00:01:12.04] we can’t do anything until we look just so. [00:01:16.08] And for many people, looking just so [00:01:20.06] is looking like everyone else out there. [00:01:23.02] And I’ll tell you what brought this on today, [00:01:25.00] besides my little, you know, light check here, [00:01:27.04] is that I was looking for someone [00:01:29.09] who told me to look for her post on Instagram, [00:01:32.04] it’s someone that we’re going to be working with. [00:01:35.00] And in full transparency, as I was scrolling down Instagram, [00:01:41.04] I couldn’t find her. [00:01:43.01] Not for not looking for her, but I couldn’t find her [00:01:46.05] because she looked like so many other people [00:01:49.06] in that particular niche. [00:01:52.06] And they develop kind of a overly styled way [00:01:58.07] of long, perfect hair that was done, [00:02:02.01] very thick makeup to accentuate the contouring, [00:02:05.09] and don’t get me wrong, I’ve got a little contouring there, [00:02:07.08] I even have a little bit of highlighter here, [00:02:09.07] and since I’m still trying to recuperate [00:02:11.05] from the lack of sleep, I’ve got extra concealer on [00:02:13.06] which, if this was a real video, [00:02:16.03] I would put a white paper in front of me [00:02:18.04] as a bounce board and fix the light, [00:02:20.02] but I was just doing this real. [00:02:22.01] So what happens is a lot of these women, [00:02:23.07] they are so into this very, very, very heavy [00:02:27.09] beauty queen makeup, or bridal hair. [00:02:33.03] This very overdone look. [00:02:36.01] And then when you meet them in real life, [00:02:38.06] they don’t look like anything like that at all. [00:02:41.02] So they go from being no makeup, [00:02:43.07] kind of gym girl, which is cool, [00:02:46.04] to this very faux heavy thick, [00:02:49.06] like you look like you can put your finger [00:02:51.04] through their foundation and rip it off, [00:02:53.06] person on camera. [00:02:55.02] And what happens is when you wear that much makeup, [00:02:59.09] and when you use that many hair extensions, [00:03:02.06] and you use that much of your curling iron, [00:03:05.08] you end up all looking like a bunch of clones, [00:03:09.08] like a bunch of ducks in a row, [00:03:11.05] and it’s impossible to distinguish one person [00:03:15.03] from the other. [00:03:16.03] But that said, it’s not to blame them for lack of trying. [00:03:21.07] It’s that they’re trying to be perfect on camera. [00:03:25.04] They’re trying to really come in in a way [00:03:28.04] where they want to look their best at all times. [00:03:33.03] They want to come across in a way that you will aspire to [00:03:37.04] because they see other people, [00:03:39.05] a lot of them are coaches in their niche, [00:03:41.09] looking exactly, exactly the same way. [00:03:45.02] And what happens is it filters you out. [00:03:47.09] It filters you out to the point that no one sees you. [00:03:50.08] No one recognizes you, and you completely, completely, [00:03:54.09] 100% lose your uniqueness. [00:03:58.03] And that’s a shame, because we’re all [00:04:00.09] unique, wonderful individuals, right? [00:04:04.06] You can tell each one from the next. [00:04:06.05] But when you don’t know someone, a lot of business owners, [00:04:09.08] a lot of female entrepreneurs, boss ladies out there, [00:04:12.07] who feel this need to all look the same. [00:04:16.07] So what happens is you don’t see their nuances. [00:04:19.07] You don’t see their spark. [00:04:21.01] You don’t see what comes out until you get really close [00:04:24.06] and then you get to know them and you’re like, [00:04:26.03] “Oh, yeah, you’re this one, you’re that one.” [00:04:28.07] So what I’m asking you to do right now [00:04:30.09] is just to just sort of stop being a perfectionist. [00:04:33.06] Let it go. Just be you. [00:04:35.05] You know, you don’t have to compete [00:04:37.07] with everyone else out there. [00:04:39.01] You don’t have to show up each time [00:04:41.07] looking perfect and special. [00:04:44.05] You don’t need to buy a whole new wardrobe. [00:04:46.07] As a matter of fact, this white shirt, [00:04:48.03] I found it in my closet. [00:04:50.03] My weight shifts up and down, this was from a down size. [00:04:53.05] It’s old, you can tell from the big sleeves. [00:04:55.03] But I kind of like it. [00:04:57.03] I kind of like this tucked in look with the gold buttons. [00:04:59.08] When I bought it in its time, [00:05:01.09] which, it’s at least 10 years old, maybe more. [00:05:05.06] Maybe more than 10, I don’t know. [00:05:07.01] It was from The Row, which is, you know, The Olsen Sisters, [00:05:10.05] but it’s their very pricey line. [00:05:12.04] I believe it was at a sample sale. It was not cheap. [00:05:15.01] And one of the reasons why I’m like, [00:05:17.01] “Well, I’ll do it this way,” [00:05:18.00] is because when I would go like that, [00:05:19.03] these little buttons would pop open and go, “Hello!” [00:05:22.01] But it’s not doing it now so maybe my boobs changed, [00:05:25.03] I don’t know. [00:05:26.01] But the point is, it’s ancient, right? [00:05:28.04] And I’m like, “I never wear white shirts,” [00:05:30.01] and I found it a little while ago [00:05:31.05] and I sent it to the cleaner, and I’m like, [00:05:32.04] “Why not?” It’s not like me, but it is me. [00:05:35.02] And that’s what I want to encourage you to do. [00:05:36.06] It’s like, do things that are different. [00:05:38.09] Don’t think you need new clothes or old clothes. [00:05:41.01] I mean I find old Zara pieces in my closet [00:05:43.06] that I haven’t worn in years. [00:05:45.00] Style them up a different way. Do different things. [00:05:47.09] Make something old new again. [00:05:49.07] If you have jewelry, I mean, I have a tendency to find [00:05:52.02] a bracelet, or a necklace, or a ring, [00:05:54.09] or a couple of pieces of jewelry that I glum on to [00:05:57.09] and I wear it all the time. [00:06:00.01] So the point is is like you [00:06:01.03] don’t have to keep buying new stuff. [00:06:03.02] You don’t have to keep doing everything that’s new. [00:06:06.04] What you have to do is be comfortable in your skin [00:06:10.05] to show up and be the best at being you, [00:06:13.00] because that’s what people are going to respond to, right? [00:06:16.07] So if you want to learn more about how to showing up [00:06:21.06] on brand by positioning yourself for success [00:06:24.01] in a way that you are completely real, [00:06:26.02] because human beings relate to other real human beings, [00:06:28.09] that you know all the pro secrets of showing up, [00:06:31.08] but you use them in a way that makes you relatable [00:06:35.02] in the niche you’re in, relatable to the platform you’re on. [00:06:38.06] I went over this in a video I did yesterday [00:06:41.06] about looking congruent and consistent to the platform [00:06:47.01] and being native to it. [00:06:48.05] So let’s say if it’s Facebook, you want to look real. [00:06:51.01] If I was talking to you and you were my friend [00:06:53.01] and I was FaceTiming you, [00:06:54.03] I’d be cool sliding my pillows around, all right? [00:06:57.01] I’d be cool sitting on the couch. [00:06:58.09] I’d be cool being, can I show you, barefoot. [00:07:02.00] Whatever it is. I’d be normal and I’d be cool. [00:07:05.02] I would be cool holding my glasses [00:07:06.08] in case I need to pick something up. [00:07:08.03] So it’s the same thing when you’re on a social platform [00:07:12.06] you need to look like you’re talking to your friends, [00:07:15.04] because you’re my friends, right? [00:07:17.03] You are my people who have friended me. [00:07:19.08] You’re the people who want to learn more from me. [00:07:21.08] You’re the people I want to learn more from as well. [00:07:24.02] And I’m sharing my expertise, I’m giving value, [00:07:27.07] but the platform is making it much more low key [00:07:31.09] than being perfect all the time, and scripted all the time, [00:07:37.01] and staged all the time, [00:07:39.04] that looks like you’re always, obviously, selling, right? [00:07:44.04] So, guys, I want you to go over to AuthenticSuperstar.com [00:07:48.06] because I really think I can help you out with that. [00:07:50.05] It’s a five day challenge, $497, [00:07:53.09] but I have it for free right now for you [00:07:57.01] because I think it’s critical. [00:07:58.07] It is so important for you to come in and show up [00:08:02.05] to be the best at being you, and relate to your customers [00:08:05.05] so you can grow your tribe, scale your business, [00:08:08.07] and really, really, really elevate [00:08:11.04] the know, like, and trust factor by being real. [00:08:15.01] Plus, it’s easy. [00:08:16.07] Far easier than what you’ve led to believe [00:08:18.05] with other big branding shoots out there, [00:08:20.03] and staged corporate photos. [00:08:22.08] Much more relatable, and it’s what’s happening now. [00:08:26.01] It’s where the shift is happening, it’s the trend right now, [00:08:29.01] and it’s being real, and real, [00:08:30.07] and congruent to the platform that you are on. [00:08:34.03] So, AuthenticSuperstar.com. [00:08:36.06] That’s where I will see you, [00:08:38.05] and I want to hear in the comments below [00:08:41.03] what you think about perfectionism, [00:08:42.09] what you think about standing out, [00:08:44.04] what you think about being real in your marketplace, [00:08:47.09] and what you do or what you need help in. [00:08:49.08] Put it in the comments below, I will check all of them. [00:08:52.05] And if you’re not sure, just give me a like or a thumbs up, [00:08:55.08] or drop a heart, or a devil’s head, I don’t care, whatever, [00:08:59.00] so I know that you were actually there [00:09:00.05] breathing and watching. [00:09:02.00] Okay, guys? [00:09:02.08] So I will see you soon at AuthenticSuperstar.com. [00:09:05.08] [kissing] [00:09:06.09] And if you’re new to me, guys, I’m Sharon Haver, [00:09:09.01] and I help other talented, smart, and savvy entrepreneurs [00:09:11.05] stand out in a crowded market when expertise is not enough. [00:09:16.00] I founded FocusonStyle.com in 1999, [00:09:19.09] I’ve been around this block a few times. [00:09:22.04] My background, my degree’s in Marketing, [00:09:24.01] I was a stylist for 15 years, [00:09:26.00] a syndicated fashion columnist, [00:09:27.05] I got it from behind the scenes, behind the camera, [00:09:30.04] to in front of the camera, to marketing, to branding, [00:09:32.05] to style, it all comes together. [00:09:35.07] It all comes together being natural, [00:09:37.09] comfortable on camera so you can attract your best audience. [00:09:41.07] And by the way, we’ve done some research here, [00:09:43.09] and what converts the best for us are photos. [00:09:48.01] Photos, baby. [00:09:49.06] These things, that get to know [00:09:50.09] the know, like, and trust factor, [00:09:52.04] but it’s the photos that are bringing the business in. [00:09:55.01] So I’m going to help you get great photos, too. [00:09:58.01]