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Hello, hello, hello,
hello, hello from my den

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and my slippery pillows.

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I wanted to come in today

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and talk to you about perfectionism.

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And before I do that,
I’m just letting you know

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that this video, it’s just all about

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not being a perfectionist.

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I actually, I very
rarely shoot from my den.

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And the light was beautiful before,

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but by the time I got
myself together, I lost it.

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So I was going to just do
a light check right now,

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and then I said, “Why not, let’s go live.”

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So you can see the light’s a little off

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but, you know, it’s cool, right?

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Because that’s the topic
about what we’re talking about

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and it is perfectionism.

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It is to think, we’re
going to just angle that

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just a little bit.

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We’re going to go out there

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and we’re going to think that sometimes,

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sometimes, sometimes,

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that we need to do our hair,

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that we need to style our outfits,

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that we need to have the right light,

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the right setup, the right everything.

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And we can’t go live, and I’ve told,

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I warned you about my slippery pillows.

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That we can’t go live,
we can’t take photos,

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we can’t do anything
until we look just so.

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And for many people, looking just so

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is looking like everyone else out there.

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And I’ll tell you what
brought this on today,

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besides my little, you
know, light check here,

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is that I was looking for someone

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who told me to look for
her post on Instagram,

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it’s someone that we’re
going to be working with.

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And in full transparency, as I
was scrolling down Instagram,

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I couldn’t find her.

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Not for not looking for
her, but I couldn’t find her

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because she looked like
so many other people

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in that particular niche.

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And they develop kind
of a overly styled way

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of long, perfect hair that was done,

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very thick makeup to
accentuate the contouring,

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and don’t get me wrong, I’ve
got a little contouring there,

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I even have a little
bit of highlighter here,

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and since I’m still trying to recuperate

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from the lack of sleep,
I’ve got extra concealer on

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which, if this was a real video,

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I would put a white paper in front of me

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as a bounce board and fix the light,

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but I was just doing this real.

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So what happens is a lot of these women,

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they are so into this
very, very, very heavy

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beauty queen makeup, or bridal hair.

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This very overdone look.

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And then when you meet them in real life,

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they don’t look like
anything like that at all.

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So they go from being no makeup,

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kind of gym girl, which is cool,

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to this very faux heavy thick,

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like you look like you can put your finger

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through their foundation and rip it off,

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person on camera.

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And what happens is when
you wear that much makeup,

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and when you use that
many hair extensions,

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and you use that much
of your curling iron,

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you end up all looking
like a bunch of clones,

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like a bunch of ducks in a row,

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and it’s impossible to
distinguish one person

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from the other.

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But that said, it’s not to
blame them for lack of trying.

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It’s that they’re trying
to be perfect on camera.

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They’re trying to really come in in a way

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where they want to look
their best at all times.

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They want to come across in
a way that you will aspire to

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because they see other people,

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a lot of them are coaches in their niche,

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looking exactly, exactly the same way.

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And what happens is it filters you out.

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It filters you out to the
point that no one sees you.

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No one recognizes you, and
you completely, completely,

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100% lose your uniqueness.

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And that’s a shame, because we’re all

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unique, wonderful individuals, right?

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You can tell each one from the next.

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But when you don’t know someone,
a lot of business owners,

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a lot of female entrepreneurs,
boss ladies out there,

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who feel this need to all look the same.

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So what happens is you
don’t see their nuances.

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You don’t see their spark.

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You don’t see what comes out
until you get really close

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and then you get to know
them and you’re like,

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“Oh, yeah, you’re this
one, you’re that one.”

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So what I’m asking you to do right now

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is just to just sort of
stop being a perfectionist.

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Let it go. Just be you.

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You know, you don’t have to compete

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with everyone else out there.

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You don’t have to show up each time

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looking perfect and special.

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You don’t need to buy
a whole new wardrobe.

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As a matter of fact, this white shirt,

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I found it in my closet.

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My weight shifts up and down,
this was from a down size.

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It’s old, you can tell
from the big sleeves.

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But I kind of like it.

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I kind of like this tucked in
look with the gold buttons.

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When I bought it in its time,

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which, it’s at least 10
years old, maybe more.

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Maybe more than 10, I don’t know.

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It was from The Row, which is,
you know, The Olsen Sisters,

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but it’s their very pricey line.

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I believe it was at a sample
sale. It was not cheap.

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And one of the reasons why I’m like,

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“Well, I’ll do it this way,”

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is because when I would go like that,

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these little buttons would
pop open and go, “Hello!”

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But it’s not doing it now
so maybe my boobs changed,

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I don’t know.

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But the point is, it’s ancient, right?

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And I’m like, “I never wear white shirts,”

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and I found it a little while ago

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and I sent it to the
cleaner, and I’m like,

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“Why not?” It’s not like me, but it is me.

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And that’s what I want
to encourage you to do.

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It’s like, do things that are different.

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Don’t think you need new
clothes or old clothes.

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I mean I find old Zara pieces in my closet

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that I haven’t worn in years.

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Style them up a different
way. Do different things.

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Make something old new again.

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If you have jewelry, I mean,
I have a tendency to find

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a bracelet, or a necklace, or a ring,

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or a couple of pieces of
jewelry that I glum on to

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and I wear it all the time.

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So the point is is like you

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don’t have to keep buying new stuff.

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You don’t have to keep
doing everything that’s new.

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What you have to do is be
comfortable in your skin

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to show up and be the best at being you,

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because that’s what people are
going to respond to, right?

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So if you want to learn
more about how to showing up

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on brand by positioning
yourself for success

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in a way that you are completely real,

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because human beings relate
to other real human beings,

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that you know all the pro
secrets of showing up,

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but you use them in a way
that makes you relatable

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in the niche you’re in, relatable
to the platform you’re on.

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I went over this in a
video I did yesterday

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about looking congruent and
consistent to the platform

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and being native to it.

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So let’s say if it’s Facebook,
you want to look real.

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If I was talking to you
and you were my friend

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and I was FaceTiming you,

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I’d be cool sliding my
pillows around, all right?

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I’d be cool sitting on the couch.

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I’d be cool being, can
I show you, barefoot.

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Whatever it is. I’d be
normal and I’d be cool.

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I would be cool holding my glasses

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in case I need to pick something up.

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So it’s the same thing when
you’re on a social platform

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you need to look like you’re
talking to your friends,

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because you’re my friends, right?

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You are my people who have friended me.

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You’re the people who want
to learn more from me.

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You’re the people I want
to learn more from as well.

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And I’m sharing my
expertise, I’m giving value,

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but the platform is making
it much more low key

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than being perfect all the
time, and scripted all the time,

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and staged all the time,

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that looks like you’re always,
obviously, selling, right?

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So, guys, I want you to go
over to AuthenticSuperstar.com

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because I really think I
can help you out with that.

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It’s a five day challenge, $497,

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but I have it for free right now for you

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because I think it’s critical.

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It is so important for
you to come in and show up

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to be the best at being you,
and relate to your customers

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so you can grow your
tribe, scale your business,

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and really, really, really elevate

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the know, like, and trust
factor by being real.

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Plus, it’s easy.

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Far easier than what you’ve led to believe

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with other big branding shoots out there,

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and staged corporate photos.

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Much more relatable, and
it’s what’s happening now.

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It’s where the shift is happening,
it’s the trend right now,

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and it’s being real, and real,

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and congruent to the
platform that you are on.

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So, AuthenticSuperstar.com.

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That’s where I will see you,

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and I want to hear in the comments below

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what you think about perfectionism,

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what you think about standing out,

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what you think about being
real in your marketplace,

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and what you do or what you need help in.

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Put it in the comments below,
I will check all of them.

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And if you’re not sure, just
give me a like or a thumbs up,

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or drop a heart, or a devil’s
head, I don’t care, whatever,

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so I know that you were actually there

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breathing and watching.

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Okay, guys?

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So I will see you soon at
AuthenticSuperstar.com.

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[kissing]
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And if you’re new to me,
guys, I’m Sharon Haver,

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and I help other talented,
smart, and savvy entrepreneurs

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stand out in a crowded market
when expertise is not enough.

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I founded FocusonStyle.com in 1999,

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I’ve been around this block a few times.

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My background, my degree’s in Marketing,

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I was a stylist for 15 years,

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a syndicated fashion columnist,

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I got it from behind the
scenes, behind the camera,

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to in front of the camera,
to marketing, to branding,

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to style, it all comes together.

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It all comes together being natural,

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comfortable on camera so you
can attract your best audience.

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And by the way, we’ve
done some research here,

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and what converts the
best for us are photos.

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Photos, baby.

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These things, that get to know

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the know, like, and trust factor,

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but it’s the photos that are
bringing the business in.

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So I’m going to help you
get great photos, too.

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